5 Important Rules For Black Friday Shoppers
'Tis the season! Bring it on! 'Black Friday' shopping should be an Olympic sport. Are you're ready? Are you in fighting shape? Then grab your caffeine, charge cards, and coupons. Let's go!
1. Plan Ahead
You need a plan. Map it out if you have to. Know where you're going and what spoils you need. Don't set yourself up for failure by dilly-dallying. Stay focused. Put the blinders on and go for it. Who cares if there's a fist fight over in aisle three you're heading to electronics!
2. Yes, You Need The Fanny Pack
You need your hands at any given moment, and you can't be schlepping around that big purse. Put on your big girl panties and then the fanny pack. Just do it. It's not a fashion show. You need to succeed for the sake of Christmas.
3. Don't Shop Alone
Today is a day to divide and conquer. You need to be fast and stealthy. Bring out the big guns. Room in the minivan is prime real estate for superstars and presents. No wimps or scaredy cats allowed. You won't need to show your talons if you have seasoned players on the sales field.
4. Nooooo Bathroom Break
If you leave the floor you will lose that coveted gift you're seeking and willing to fight for. This is a battle your bladder can't win! Hold it for the sake of Christmas! If you're wavering on this rule than add a poise pad to the big girl panties.
5. If You Can't Play By These Rules, Then Stay Home
Everyone knows Black Friday shoppers are a unique, talented breed. You need to be willing to star in the 5:00 news for that PlayStation and laptop. Yes, when you leave your house at 3 am you know there's a possibility that you could be the headline story. Nice girls finish last on Black Friday.