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What Is a Semi-Happy Marriage?

Photo by Noel Vasquez/Getty Images
Photo by Noel Vasquez/Getty Images

There is a new book entitled “Marriage Confidential” where you can find out what to do if you’re in a kinda boring but not a miserable marriage. It’s safe to say that you’ve seen or know of a couple where the term ‘semi-happy marriage’ describes them to a tee. Or perhaps it’s your marriage?

Semi-happy couples should be happy according to the book. But is that happiness just on paper or in real life? In a survey for the book, “Marriage Confidential,”

30% agreed that “most marriages I see around me aren’t really happy or unhappy.” 40% agreed, “most marriages that I see aren’t really that happy.” Marriage scholars distinguish between the types of marriage that end in divorce. They’ve estimated that a majority of divorces — anywhere from 55 to 65% — hail from the ranks of the “low-conflict,” low-stress, amiable but listless marriage. The majority don’t come from couples who throw dishes and scream at each other. Where the high-conflict, troubled marriage explodes, the low-conflict marriage implodes.

Wow, so it appears that the semi-happy marriage is more likely to end in divorce than the explosive one. Do you worry about divorce? Have you fantasizing about moving? Do you have conversations with yourself about expecting more from your marriage? You may be in a semi-happy marriage that works efficiently, where you get along reasonably, but one or both members may find the marriage lacking in serious ways. Some may tell you that this situation could use marriage counseling. If you need assistance, try The Marriage Couching Center in New Hartford. They can be reached at (315) 520-3388. (not a sponsorship, just a suggestion from this author).

Next: How Long Will Your Marriage Last?

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