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America’s Got Talent: Episode 9 Review

NBC

What makes Florida so great? No, not the faux zombie apocalypse, but rather the people. There’s all sorts of individuals residing in Tampa Bay, Florida who are yearning to have their chance in the spotlight. Luckily for them, ‘America’s Got Talent‘ gives them that opportunity. But the question is: will they shine or flub on their first try out on that stage.

Tampa Bay’s got spirit, yes it does, as we’re brought into the new town by the always energetic Nick Cannon. Usually Howard Stern, Howie Mandell and Sharon Osborne aren’t that incredibly happy to be sitting in the judges chairs but there must be something in Tampa to make them so happy. Crocodiles? Nah. It’s probably the superb talent out there.

It’s time to meet The Untouchables, a group headed by a couple who previously appeared on the show with their dance troupe Miami All Stars. Is it legal for somebody to be in a show twice? Guess it doesn’t count if all of the dancers are new. What makes it even cuter is the fact that this couple has their own children in the group and that they’re all between the ages of 8-13. Now, are you ready for some awesome dancing? Of course you are. And no duh they’re advancing to the next round.

We’ve got a couple of brothers, the Scott Brothers to be precise. No, they’re nowhere near similar to the Super Mario Bros but from their robotic moves they could definitely fit in the 8-bit video games. Then there’s Charley C, an awesome R&B singer who probably could sing songs to make out to. Lastly there’s Taylor Reed, a magician who proves he’s worth a million dollars by making a motorcycle appear out of thin air. Yes, they’re all going to Las Vegas.

Puppets on Hand has arrived, and this may not be good given the horribly mischievous music playing for them in the background. Howard busts their chops and their act is cute if we were all first graders watching puppets live for the first time. Unfortunately they’re all being booed off which is a bit sad to see.

Bad performers montage is here! There’s a dance troupe that can’t even tell us their name properly, a paper tearer who shows us how to properly waste trees in order to get on a show. Then there’s an expert at the sport of air sex. Gross. Now here’s a group who feels like they’re inspired by the movie “Mirror Mask.” This group isn’t really doing much of anything but showing how goofy they look.

Oh no, here comes the pirates. Secretly we were hoping that Captain Dan and the Survy Crew is secretly a goofy rap crew and they are! Except they aren’t as funny as people thought they’d be. “This is getting worse as we go along.” says Howard. Thankfully they got booed off the stage. Thank you audience!

Everyone loves animals, right? Well Luanne wants to show everybody how awesome her water-skiing squirrel Twiggy is. Unfortunately for Nick Cannon he experienced how much her squirrel likes him by it pissing on his shoulder. But he’s cute and chunky so we would forgive him. Okay, so Twiggy didn’t make it to the next round but he was still adorable to watch.

Welcome the American BMX Stunt Team. They’re brought together by their love for BMX. Let’s see if somebody finally breaks their bones during this show. Believe us, we’ve been waiting for awhile to see if this will happen. They aren’t super impressive, which is probably because they decided to do their act on the stage instead of outside. Maybe they’ll really strut their stuff on the next round.

Want to see an act that really shines? Look no further than Lindsey Norton, a sixteen year old acrobatic dancer. She’s just a ball of happy ready to show off her great acrobatic skills. She’s very nimble on her feet and the fact that she’s doing a solo makes this all the more great.

It’s time to see some older folks perform, or as Nick Cannon says “Don’t break a hip!” What we’re exposed to is a series of bad dances from several groups of older people. One that stands out in particular is Richard, the lackluster dancing man who hits himself in the face with a cane by accident. Sharon’s mean enough to laugh when he does that. That’s rude.

Last we have Big Barry, a supposed seventy year old teenager whose specialty is singing. “Hopefully this is the start of something big, no pun intended.” Sadly Big Barry can’t sing if his life depended on it. Howard starts talking about how much he didn’t like the act, then Howie tells him he’d love to see the two next to each other. Hilarity ensues. What’s even more hilarious is the fact that Howard caved in and decided he’s going to Vegas.

Now we’re finally going to our last stop before Vegas. But will there be an act that will top the others we’ve seen so far? We’ll just have to find out next week on ‘America’s Got Talent.’

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