This list was composed by someone who, regretfully, ate one of the five last night...

Hi, my name is Megan and I am extremely upset with myself. I violated a cardinal rule of food delivery and am currently paying the price.

And since I work in radio, I am turning my pain and agony into hilarious content - partly to teach myself a lesson, but mostly to entertain you. This is your cue to point and laugh.

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I totally deserve it.

Anyway, if you would rather not feel the dizzying euphoria of food poisoning, do not order these five foods for delivery.

1. Anything with avocado

Avocado is tasty, but it doesn't travel well.

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Brendon Thorne
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Then again, what do you expect from the fruit that's known to expire quickly?

So. it's best to remove that avocado toast from your delivery order. You might just spare yourself from visiting tummy ache city.

2. Eggs

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While that egg sandwich picture might look great on a delivery menu, it probably won't look that way when it arrives at your door. Eggs tend to stink when they're not fresh. Plus, they don't taste that great when they're cold.

If you don't want to be taken out by a rotten egg, it's best to eat it fresh at the restaurant.

3. Tuna, potato or egg salad

These things can taste absolutely delicious, but only when they're served to you fresh and cold.

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Now think about how an potato salad or tuna sandwich will taste after sitting in a lukewarm car for 30-or-so minutes. Think about what the temperature and time will do to them.

Also, bacteria loves to grow in moist dishes. Do you really want to tempt fate?

4. French fries

Two words: Soggy city.

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French fries lose their crisp and crunch after a certain amount of time, and chances are their freshness will have long passed by the time they get to your door.

Plus they will be sitting in their own oils, meaning you'll be chowing down on greasy, floppy fries. Your stomach might not approve.

5. Sushi

In the same vein as tuna sandwiches, raw fish should be eaten fresh at the restaurant -- as in straight out of the kitchen.

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Just like those egg and potato salads, raw fish becomes unsafe to eat after hitting a certain temperature.

I also intimately know this because, well, that's what I ordered last night. I had a massive craving for sushi and ordered from a highly-rated spot... but my driver was not very punctual.

In fact, my order was delayed by over an hour and I didn't have the foresight to think that was probably a really bad for me. While everything tasted okay, my stomach began doing a war dance after a few hours.

I fully own my mistake and that's why I am warning you. It's not worth it.

Save yourself.

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